Dear Obi-Wan, You blow, and only one person has signed our guestbook in the last year. Why is that? Phoebe.

Obi-Wan Kenobi (her FORMER boss) says:

Dear Phoebe,

Firstly, it is NONE of your business what I do in my bedroom with my, boy- err, GIRLFRIENDS!

Secondly, I would like to point out that TWO people have signed the guestbook in the past year!

YOU MAKE NUMBER TWO! SUCKER!!!

AND WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME THIS? AND WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN? I DIDN'T GIVE YOU ANY VACATION HOURS!

YOU'RE FIRED, SO GET BACK TO WORK!!